Lessons Learned

Have you ever been out to eat with a friend or two, and the conversation seems to dwindle to an awkward silence where all you can hear is the obnoxious people at the table across from you? Everyone at your table is unusually silent, just listening to the adjacent table laugh and giggle loudly about "how many Jewish people they know", or one's "gay brother's boyfriend". Some form of this situation occurs to everyone, I'm sure. It happened to me and my roommate tonight while out eating sushi. Normally she and I can't keep our mouths shut. But tonight, across from a party of seven or eight, we had no words. Do you ever wonder why these rare restaurant silences occur?

Here's my two cents: You are quiet because you and the rest of your party are thoroughly annoyed with the overbearing party of seven or eight. Since you're too busy formulating a way to indirectly yet conspicuously show these people how inappropriately over-the-top they are, you cannot even think up a casual conversation of your own. So instead, you grit your teeth and look across the table to your company, and when you lock eyes a complete conversation is transported. A conversation relating to how you would love to tell them that Jewish people are as uncommon as plaid shirts nowadays, and that no one else is curious about your gay brother's boyfriend.

On the other hand, it is one of my guilty pleasures to eavesdrop on surrounding conversations occasionally (especially in New York--eccentric people=great conversations=this blog). But it's one thing to have a conversation being tapped, and another to advertise your business to everyone in the restaurant including the dishwasher in the back.

Actually, now that I think about it some more, perhaps I've been guilty doing this. In fact, I'm positive because I've glanced at nearby tables at times to find that they are silently eating their food--with the same energy of muted insanity as I had tonight. Whoops.

Lesson Learned: Don't be that party at a restaurant. Have a good time, but let's not be attention whores!

The Countdown is On!!!

We are at t-minus 23 days until graduation, and a month and three days left until my lease is up in Raleigh, I'm still a jobless, yet hopeful NYC Bound "New-Yorker-wannabe". I started this blog late last year in hopes to document my progress to the city. And after reading back through some of my older posts (particularly here and here), it's truly feeling like the same shit, different day.

But this post is not intended for me to bitch and complain about how hard it is (I'm pretty sure I've already done that...). Instead, I want to take the moment to say I'm not giving up that easy. In fact, since it is coming down the wire I've become more amped about the thought of living in the city. And with my heightened excitement, comes mounds of ideas of what I will do when I arrive. Here are just a few things I cannot wait to do as a New Yorker:

-Be able to give directions to lost tourists
-Sit in Bryant Park at lunchtime and observe swoon over the handsome suited men on their lunch breaks
-Have a night out with my friends and know that my dependable DD will always be there
-Go to a Yankees game [against the Bo-Sox]
-Eat REAL NY pizza whenever I crave it without the disappointment of imitations
-change my phone number to a NYC area code
-design my first apartment hole-in-the-wall and make it appear chic

And the list goes on...can't wait to check these items off my NYC bucket list!

Pick Me Ups Part 2

How come this kind of stuff never happens in North Carolina??? And more importantly, how the hell do you become part of this type of movement? If there is one being planned for Grand Central, I want in. This video is similar to this one I've posted in the past.



I suddenly have the urge to watch The Sound of Music.

A "He's Just Not That Into You" Moment

A conversation between the girls and I a couple weeks ago at a bar.

Me: Who are you calling?
Friend 1: That guy I was telling you about...you know, the one I'm kinda talking to.
Me: Ohhh yeah yeah! I remember. You guys hanging out later tonight?
Friend 1: Well if his phone doesn't ring and goes straight to voice mail, what does that mean? I hate being ignored!
Friend 2: His phone might be dead.
Friend 3: No, I hate to tell you but he might be ignoring your call...
Me: He might just being going through a dead-zone. You should call back and see if it rings now.

WTF. Why do we constantly go through the motions of trying to make sense of something so minuscule as a phone call? Four usually bright girls that can often offer intellectual conversation analyzing a simple phone call and reasons why he's "ignoring" a call. This is the story of many ladies across the world I'm sure. As you can tell from the conversation above, I'm a victim of this over-analyzing problem too. Let's get it together, ladies! Why can't we all just say "He's phone went straight to voice mail." End of story. No need to analyze it. Stop making something so simple into a difficult, unnecessary mess.

If us ladies put that much energy into analyzing this recession we're in, I'm pretty sure solutions for a flourishing economy would be thrown around left and right.

It's not what you know...or who you know...

I just got out of a class lecture where we discussed how important it is to build a strong network. The professor kept stressing "it's not what you know, it's who you know". It seemed the majority of the class agreed because some students elaborated by stating "My friends and I are trying to get internships in New York for the summer, and each of my friends have accepted an internship because they knew someone that helped them out in New York. But I'm still searching and applying because I don't have that network." This struck a chord...

For me, I think networking can be one of two things. It can be 1.) the best tool or 2.) complete bull shit. I don't think it's necessarily about who you know. I think it's more about what these people you know are willing to do for you. You can build your network all you want, and attempt to create a strong relationship with these people but at the end of the day, if this same desire isn't reciprocated from the other party...your network is worthless. For me, I know quite a few people in New York, but still am struggling to find a job post grad. By no means do I assume some one to just hand it to me on a platter, and say "here's a job!". I think I'm doing a lot for myself searching and scouring my network, online job search engines, company websites, etc... But without the right network of people my efforts fall flat. It is so frustrating to know I am so close to my dream and my goal but can't reach it. It is frustrating because I know I'm doing all I can given my shitty network but it's still not enough. Not to mention being in North Carolina not New York adds limitations too.

Perhaps taking a step back, and finding my "gatekeeper" to NYC will help me reset. I'm so blinded right now by my frustrations that I can't see clearly anymore where I am on this journey. Maybe I'm not entirely ready for the city...

Nevertheless, with or without the right network I'm going to figure this out eventually. I might need to reassess my time line, but I am definitely not going to give up that easily.

I Feel Old When...

I begin to feel attracted to a man, but later come to realize that the ring on his left hand finger is not just decorative. Nope, this mister is off the market. Just when I think the search was hard enough, another bonus is added! So, on top of trying to find a decent man, I now have crossed over into finding a decent man that isn't married.

Lesson learned: now that I'm getting older and [supposedly] more mature, I guess I should start paying attention to whether or not a man sports a band around his left hand finger. And by pay attention, I mean before I.......well for lack of a better term "spit my game".

And another one bites the dust...

Dear New York,

Many hours you have kept me up at night yearning to be in your presence. Many sacrifices I've made in preparation to be with you. Many tears I've shed in fear that you will reject me.

And still I try. With each struggle, I try even harder refusing to settle for anything less than you.

And I hope. I hope you will deem me worthy for the undertaking. I hope you will let me proudly wear your name. I hope, New York, that you will make room in your beautiful heart for me.

Is it meant to be between you and I, New York? Show me a sign...

Until then, I will wait until the time comes when you will welcome me with open arms into the greatness, oh the irrefutable greatness, of New York.

xoxo,
NYC Bound