Things I'm Going to Miss

This morning, at 8:00AM, I walked into my very last exam in my undergraduate career and felt a strange calmness. At 9:20AM, I turned in my exam when my professor asked me, "Are you graduating? I will need to grade your exam first if you are." I smiled, nodded, and walked out with a strange sadness. I've been anticipating the end, this moment, for such a long time--literally begging time to hurry up. And now that it is finally here, I can't help but beg time to slow down. College has flashed before my eyes faster than I ever thought a span of four years could move. All I want to do is enjoy my last days being a college student, basking in this moment but it's already all over. Normally I would fuss and complain about studying, holding it off until the very last minute. But during my FINAL final exam, I was comfortable and willing to study. Perhaps because it was the very last time I would partake in this practice, I subconsciously felt the need to relish in the moment. But for the first and last time, I was happy and enjoying studying.

As cliche as it sounds, graduating college is truly a bittersweet experience. The past four years of my life have been nothing short of a liberating experience that has been crucial in learning and growing into the person I am and will be. I'm healthily scared on what lies ahead of me. Coming out of high school I was convinced I would go to college, find my soul mate and get married. But now, I'm at a completely different place. No soul mate. No marriage any in sight yet. Let's hope this time my future plans are more realistic. What do I see for myself in the future?

New York? For certain.
Working for an ad agency? Hopeful.
Being a published author? Perhaps.
Soul mate? Laughable at the moment, but possible.
Marriage? Still no where in sight.
Success? Inevitable.

NC State, I'm going to miss you dearly. You've been my home, my adult foundation, my life. I cannot thank you enough for the past four years I've spent with you. I only hope to do you proud and show you what I've learned from you. I'm going to miss the deep-fried-everything, knee-slapping country music, cheerwine, southern accents, and even the mulch smell. I will always bleed red, and never forget where I came from.

In the words of Michael Scott (The Office), "You have no idea how high I can fly."

Things I'm Going to Miss

As ready as I am to get out of the south and start my life in the city, there are so many things I'm going to miss. Going to basketball games with my girls is one of them. We literally had the highest seats in the house, constantly wiping our bleeding noses and struggling to breathe because of the elevation. But despite the bad seats, nothing could come close to ruining our spirited screams of "GO TO HELL CAROLINA!!!" at the top of our lungs. Even if we were down by 15 points. Actually, sitting that high up made me bask in the moment and realize how much I'm going to miss this...

We're the Red and White from State
And we know we are the best (Hey!)
Hands behind our back
We can take on all the rest
GO TO HELL CAROLINA!
Devils and Deacs stand in line
We're the Red and White from NC State
GO STATE!

time

On my path towards "adulthood", I find myself at a critical moment in my life. In my last and final year at my alma mater, I find myself reflecting more than usual on the past 4 years of my life. Although I am overly anxious to walk across the stage, and be the first in my family to receive a college diploma, I can't help but think what happened to time? Here's what I came up with:

-Time happened when I was testing my ability (or inability) to hold my liquor at the infamous beer pong house every weekend, desperate to prove that I was not a noob.

-Time happened when I skipped out on a late night study session the night before a test to instead pull an all nighter out with the girls.

-Time happened when I did stay in and study for the big test the next morning...work hard, play harder right?

-Time happened when facebook, youtube, and perezhilton.com consumed my attention, further contributing to my chronic procrastination.

-Time happened when I pledged a co-ed professional business fraternity, and devoted a majority of my time using this to build my professionalism, social network, and taking all leadership opportunities thrown at me (including the title of El Presidente)

-Time happened when I struggled deciding what I wanted to do after I graduate, thoroughly convinced that I picked the wrong major.

-Time happened when I learned what the true meaning of friendship is through many failed ones [Insert Kenny Chesney's 'You Find Out Who Your Friends Are' music here]

-Time happened when I learned that college is not the place where I will find my soulmate; let alone a steady relationship having nothing more serious than a fling in 4 years.

-Time happened during countless football & basketball games, countless beer bongs at the tailgate, countless nail-biting games that sometimes turned in our favor, countless red-painted body moments, and of course countless "go to hell carolina"'s.

-Time happened when a combination of all of the above and so much more allowed me to grow up.

Even though it feels like just yesterday that I was a freshman eating easy mac and ramen on countless occasions, it also feels like I know more than I did back then. I am wiser. Still young and naive, but nevertheless closer to feeling like I have the experience, independence, and knowledge to stand on my own. So thank you, college, for the past 4 years of my life.